The
Vietnamese are a polite and peaceful people who extend
a warm welcome to foreigners. They are tolerant of
the inability of visitors to understand their country
and will accept levels of behaviour and dress from
them that would normally
not
be acceptable. However, a few things can sometimes
cause offence.
To
get on well with people in Vietnam ....
...
don't tell them how to run their country!
Although not particularly politically inclined, Vietnamese
people are very patriotic and resent the tendency
of some foreigners to regard our country as 'backward'
or criticise the communist system of government. The
'human rights' debate is not one-sided, nor is it
as simple as some Western observers seem to think.
It is not 'taboo' to discuss politics in Vietnam,
but any sort of critical proselytising is likely to
meet stony silence and may even lead to problems with
the authorities. We Vietnamese paid a very high price
for our independence but, by doing so, we won the
right to run our country how we wish.
... dress respectfully!
Beachwear is a potential problem. Although not specifically
prohibited, nudity is culturally unacceptable, particularly
for Vietnamese women who are embarrassed by 'sexy'
swimsuits and topless sunbathing. It will also attract
unwelcome attention from Vietnamese men. Skimpy clothes,
shorts and so on worn by either gender in temples
and pagodas are also culturally offensive.
... don't expect
'Western-style' politeness
Some forms of Vietnamese behaviour may seem to be
rude or unfriendly. For example, the Vietnamese don't
understand the invisible 'no contact' comfort zone
that people from the West automatically observe. Pushing
and shoving in queues and on crowded pavements is
commonplace.
Some older Vietnamese
people avoid eye contact. In the West, this is regarded
as an indication of shiftiness or dishonesty - here
is traditional politeness to avert one's eyes downward
as an expression of respect.
... be fair
and reasonable
Being asked to pay an inflated price in markets and
so on is normal - bartering is expected, but must
be good-humoured to be effective. An attempt to push
the price down as far as possible is not appreciated.
Many people in Vietnam are still very poor - some
of the people selling goods in the street earn only
a couple of dollars a week. Visitors are in a powerful
position - please pay a fair price, not the cheapest
possible. On the other hand, paying an inflated price
will make you look stupid in Vietnamese eyes, but
you'll be very popular until your money runs out!
... don't get
cross
Getting angry is a guaranteed way of losing 'face'
and with it, respect. No matter how frustrating a
particular situation might be, anger is a guaranteed
way not to achieve your objective. Remember that 'the
customer is always right' adage definitely doesn't
apply in Vietnam. Aggressive complaining will usually
be met with a wall of indifference.
... think before
you complain
If a Vietnamese person makes a mistake - an error
with your meal order or damaging your laundry, for
example - please remember that, if you demand a refund
or refuse to pay, the money will probably come from
the pocket of the person directly responsible, not
the business. A matter of principle for an irate tourist
can cost a hapless employee a month's wages!
... don't be
rude
Putting your fingers in your mouth when eating, or
using a toothpick without shielding your mouth from
view with your other hand, is considered rude. However,
although both actions might upset some old people,
the younger generation is much less bothered.
Gestures need particular
attention. In the West, it is commonplace for people
to cross their fingers to invoke good luck. In Viet
Nam, this gesture represents the female genitalia
and is the ultimate obscene gesture. Its inadvertent
use, however well intentioned, will provoke considerable
offence. Beckoning should be done with the palm facing
downwards using the whole hand. Beckoning Western-style
with the palm upwards is used only for young children
and animals in Vietnam - doing it with fingers only
is also an obscene gesture. It is highly insulting
to beckon old people however you do it.
In Vietnam, public
body contact is only OK between people of the same
gender - a man can hold hands with another man, but
to do so with a woman would be embarrassing. Vietnamese
people recognise that foreigners behave differently
and make allowances, but passionate kissing and similar
behaviour will cause offence!
...
and, most important of all, ...
... laugh and
smile as much as possible!
Good humour will go a long way to resolving practically
all problems between foreigners and Vietnamese.
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